Make Yourself Happy

Good afternoon and welcome back to another blog. It finally feels like we can say summer is back as the weather continues to get sunnier and warmer. I'm sure most of you are taking advantage of that by having barbecues, going to the pub, meeting with family and friends or just spending time outdoors exercising. I know when I spend time outside it makes me happy. That is what today's topic is - how to keep yourself in a happy state of mental health. Now for various reasons I may not be the best person to give advice on this, but I want to try and help some of you increase your level of happiness. I've tried to compile a list of small things that can be done easily, quickly and hassle-free. They can be done anywhere and by yourself for the ultimate level of convenience. The only things that are needed are the desire and willingness to want to be more happy.

Let's start with something that is very underrated and taken for granted - breathing. Yes we do it every day but are you doing it properly? Take one deep breath in and out. Just one deep breath can turn down your fight-or-flight instinct and activate your rest-and-restore mode. This takes a matter of seconds to complete and the amount of breaths you take is up to you. You will feel more relaxed and content with every breath you take.

The next one is to try and find something in your day that triggers a sense of gratitude. It could be that you are looking forward to going to work (weirdo), you might have enjoyed your scrambled eggs on toast this morning or you had time to relax and read the newspaper at lunch time. Take a minute to absorb that feeling of gratitude. The more time you can spend lingering on a positive experience, the more positivity you will embed in your brain.

Following on from that, try taking some time to appreciate an event that did not happen during the day. Hopefully nobody in your family got sick, you haven't had any trouble starting your car and nobody has picked a fight with you. It is important that we keep things in perspective. Whilst we might not have had anything particularly good happen, not having anything bad happen is just as important. As the old saying goes, no news is good news.

Next is something that I have mentioned in several previous blogs (make sure to check them out after you finish reading this one). And that is to smile. Being happy doesn't just come from the inside, but also on the outside with our actions or behaviours towards ourselves and others. The deliberate decision to smile at someone in the street can help to activate happiness-inducing chemicals in our brain. Smiling is the easiest thing we can do to make ourselves feel good.

Flipping that around, slap a label on any negative feelings you might have. Are you angry? Sad? Anxious? Helpless? The simple act of labelling our emotions can feel like a weight being lifted off our shoulders. Attaching a label to an emotion can help shift it from the emotional part of our brain to the thinking part. This in turn will make you feel less hurt and more in control. The more in control of our lives we feel, the more satisfied we will be with it.

This next one will be interesting to see how many of you do it. How many of you sit up straight all the time (I don't I'm guilty). Poor posture whilst sitting can lead to a negative emotional state. Studies show that people who constantly slouch can experience bad moods, lower self-esteem and poorer confidence compared to someone who always sits up-right. Sitting up straight can give us a sense of confidence and assertiveness, leading to a happier mood. Having good posture also helps our physical well-being by preventing neck, shoulder and back problems. So to lift your mood, lift your body.

We all pay attention to the big things in life such as getting a new job, but do we really take notice of the small pleasures. Author and Psychology Today blogger Rick Hanson (check out his blogs too) writes about taking in the good in his book Hardwiring Happiness (well worth the read). He recommends really appreciating the small but good things in our lives, noting "Most opportunities for a good experience arrive with little fanfare. You finished an email, the telephone works, you have a friend." For the best results with this bring pleasant thoughts, objects and people to the forefront of your awareness. Take a few moments to allow this to sink in. You should see your happiness level slowly increase.

This next one sounds obvious but you really have to appreciate yourself and see your own positive qualities. Otherwise what chance is there of other people doing this? Try to write down one thing you have achieved each day. This could be starting a project for school or work, sealing that deal at work or something simpler like a conversation with a friend that ended well. Drawing attention to your strengths will life your spirits.

We will all experience negative events in our lives. However, even the seemingly worst thing will always have a positive silver lining waiting to be found. Start thinking about that setback as a challenge rather than a failure. Work out how you can begin to move forward to turn that negative into something worth your time and effort. Life has thrown down the gauntlet to you. Pick it up and throw it straight back.

We all experience good times in our lives and these form the basis of anyone's happiness. One of the best ways to remember these is to look back through old photos of good times with people who love you. Or you can look at a picture of something that makes you feel calmer and happier. Taking a few minutes to look at pictures of nature will help to lower stress levels and blood pressure. To keep yourself from getting too used to one particular photo, make an album of images that make you happy. Whenever you are feeling stressed, you can look through the album and remember why you put them in there.

The benefits to these tips might seem obvious, but the feeling of happiness goes deeper than just smiling to your neighbour. Our brains are predisposed to pay more attention to the bad things than the good. We must not be ruled by our negativity. We must strive to be ruled by feelings of joy, good relationships and humour. Happiness activities help to balance out that negative bias so we experience life with a more positive mindset.

Experiencing and absorbing moments of happiness can have long-term brain benefits. Happy thoughts and experiences can grow neural circuits in our brain. These neural structures provide inner-strength, resilience, enthusiasm, gratitude and happiness. So give these small steps a try. You'll find that your happiness quotient rises with each second of happiness, but also that making yourself happier becomes easier the more you do it.

As I stated at the beginning I am not a psychology expert and do not know about specific brain activity. However, these are some tips that I find useful to help get me out of a bad spell in life. If you think I can help further or you have a question about any one of these tips, please leave a comment and I will do my best to assist further. Please let me know also if you would like a part 2 of this blog where I can explore deeper the true meaning of happiness.

Enjoy the sun and the pubs!

Connor

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